Two days ago, I was informed that I will be removed from my position as a mod of . I can't disclose exactly why (out of respect for privacy, and because some of it wasn't passed on to me), but I know that the situation was apparently unrepairable and non-negotiable, so all I can do is try to deal with the decision with grace. I'm trying to do so, for the sake of the group as well as my own sake, but processing the sadness and shock is taking some time.
As a result of this, I'm taking a hiatus from HPM for a while to consider my options. Leaving the group would be a difficult decision, but at the same time, the circumstances suggest that I may no longer be a good fit for the group even as a player, and I may have to respect that. I haven't been the most active for a while now, so I suppose this isn't really a surprise, but after spending two years in a group and one of those years trying to serve it as a mod, it's hard to know whether disengaging is the right thing to do.
I'll be honest: I didn't want this to be one of those "I'M THINKING ABOUT QUITTING THE GAME SO EVERYONE GIVE ME LOVE AND ATTENTION AND TELL ME HOW RAD I AM" journals, but I'm a little lost right now, and support and advice would help. I've made a lot of friends through HPM, and now I might need these friends to help me muddle through -- either to get back to productivity and being a positive for the group as a player, or to figure out how to maintain these friendships without the game. I apologize if I lean on any of you too hard in this time, but right now I think I may need it.